Tis the Season

ah forgive me dear goddess for i have sinned it's been a week since my last confession

i've been to the mountain i've been to the sea i've been swept up by the snows of your love i've been smitten by the icicles of your bitterness yes i've been

running running running

i'm always running

it's that time of year it's that time of life it's that fucking time of day there is a rift in the veil there is there is there is and i don't know how it ever came to be how it came to be but it came to be and how i don't know you know

it's all in the rift

there must have been a rift in the clouds that allowed it to happen must've been must've been yeah it's all in the rift baby that would be me that would be you that would be us

who are we what are we how you define yourself how do i define myself how does your family how does my family how bow wow baby i'm your dog now i'm wagging my tail i'm your puppy dog lapping up your love lapping up your sugar begging you begging you begging you

let me through

the missouri runs into the mississippi and becomes the mississippi the ohio runs into the mississippi and becomes the mississippi my seed runs into you and becomes you baby i ain't no cossack i ain't no cossack i ain't no cossack what about the missouri what about the ohio i ain't riding no horse baby i ain't wearing no funny hat baby i don't do no funky dances baby i'm just a cracker from the woods from the swamps i'm just a dog for your love

ain't no presents under the hannukah bush baby your bush is the only bush for me baby ain't no presents ain't no presents why'd you take my seed the love the love where's my tree

the snow swirls around and around and around and the world stops spinning spinning and it's dark but it's white out nothing but white swirling swirling spraying spitting spurting spinning the front wheel drive just ain't happening trucks big fucking trucks with lots and lots of wheels

what goes up
must come down
spinnin' wheel
got to go round
talkin' 'bout your troubles
it's a cryin' sin
ride a painted pony
let the spinning wheel spin

heading up i-5 trying to make the slopes ain't going to happen just ain't going to happen too much snow on the ground too much snow in the air too much snow on my wheels responsibility from my loins just wanting to make the slopes ain't going to happen exit exit better exit little buttfuck town in little buttfuck egypt somewhere on the way up mount shasta toothless rednecks driving nineteen-seventy-two f-two-fifties with rebuilt three-nineties not the original three-sixties charging seventy-five dollars to wrap chains around the tires of the innocent one hundred fifty if you forgot your chains

buttfuck egypt motel not hotel motel owner standing behind the counter in bathrobe and socks only motel on the road with a vacancy sign on we get the last room people behind us poor fucking bastards get no room we're already five people not much opportunity to say hey want to stay with us we have two dogs too one is bigger than two of my kids sixteen rooms heater worked too well when it was on too cold when it was off

you got no money
you got no home
spinnin' wheel
all alone
talkin' 'bout your troubles
and you never learn
ride a painted pony
let the spinning wheel turn

snowing when we went to bed snowing when we woke up snowing when we walked the mile into town to find a little grocery store where we bought breakfast we came to ski we had the right clothes we met people who did not come to ski who were trying to drive to oregon from southern california or were trying to drive to southern california from oregon they did not have the right clothes they were walking in the snow in tennis shoes hotel was full of dogs full of kids full full full the owner still frowning jowl to jowl hasn't had this many people since the last big snowstorm seven years ago

meet the folks in the other rooms all of them hanging by the doorway none of them wanting to close the door and the world behind them especially when it locked them into a room of twenty-two cable channels and pillows dating back to nineteen-eighty-three folks from all over a couple of them local met greg and his wife and his two kids he's been there three weeks no big deal moving back into town from the next town over he grew up here he's a roofer not much roofing this week eh smoking cigarettes comparing brands with the woman

next door

who is there with her two daughters she's local as well boyfriend threw her out this morning rat bastard sonny you know him greg says sonny down at the shell station yeah that's the rat bastard yeah i know him he threw you out huh fucking-a got a cigarette

woman a couple doors down up from merced heading to eugene to see her sister has her four-year old with her i buy her some cereal and milk when i walk to the store and help dig our her van along with greg who helped dig me out i slip him a twenty and also a twenty to lonny who lives down the street lonny is just walking up and down the street collecting tips to help dig people out

another couple up from sacramento driving a uhaul to seattle with two kids they speak hebrew and my kids talk to them they are from jaffa moved to sacramento now moving to seattle started out in the ukraine

another couple from oregon coming up from orange county dude i was just fucking surfing this morning what the fuck is this all about my wife told me not to go surfing said we'd get caught in a storm if we didn't leave she's pissed i'm fucking toast dude but the waves were fucking killer worth it know what i mean

someone waiting
just for you
spinnin' wheel
spinnin' true
drop all your troubles
by the riverside
catch a painted pony
on the spinning wheel side

christmas season is always hard always hard married into the tribe left my jesus behind left my tree behind left my stockings on the mantle back in georgia left my fucking flocking in the swamp

not that jesus hadn't already left me i went looking for him and found this moses chick that rocked my world that melted my butter that whipped my cream that creamed my cheese i found religion all right and it was in her pants and then it was in her mind then it was in her heart and

we made a deal we agreed that when the little fucking love nuggets sprung forth we'd make them one with moses do the hannukah thing do the passover thing do the yom kippur thing do the sabbath thing do the candles thing so many fucking candles so many fucking holidays it's like we work for the fucking french government for chrissake

we made a deal

ah stella i remember our rivers before they merged running so close together mixing together splashing together one hot stormy morning rainbows on the windows sunshine in our hearts splish splash sweat blood sweat tears semen ah stella

a-do-nai oz le-amo yi-tien a-do-nai ye-va-rech et a-mo va-shalom may adonai give strength to god's people may adonai bless the people

the storm broke and the rift appeared in the clouds and we made a run for it we took a shot before they came back together we made a run for it we made it home we dug out after two days we dug out and they plowed some roads and we pushed and we rocked and we rolled and we made it home

we made a deal we made a deal we made a deal

jesus loves me and that is cool but i made a deal

most of the time it's easy but this is the season

when it ain't for some reason for some reason for some reason but

i'm still in love

 

Would I Be King

and jesus said unto them because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you if ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed ye shall say unto this mountain remove hence to yonder place and it shall remove and nothing shall be impossible unto you

i have faith baby but my faith is in love you may call love jesus jesus is love you may call love the buddha with his golden tummy you may call love the krishna you may call love that sweet fold between the legs of the goddess you you may

you may know my name you don't know me you don't know my truth

i may know your name i don't know you i don't know your truth

love drips down my chin love drips down my chin and it's all good it's all right it's all sorts of sunday school cheer

jesus said

love me three times

and i've captured your soul i've captured your heart i've captured your fucking liver and kidney pie i've got you by the throat and you are mine thank you thank you thank you

ok the j-man may not have said that but

little black eddie
sat on his dump pile
fingering nuclear rubble
maybe he'll fry
maybe he'll die
maybe he'll simmer and bubble

the world and the way it would be would i be king would i be emperor would i be exalted ruler would i be the one who snaps his finger and says let it be so number one the world and the way it would be

i would do a mean rodney king and ask that we just get along and it would be so

i would do a mean john lennon and imagine that there was no war and it would be so

i would do a mean martin luther king and refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt and there would be justice for all

i would do a mean jerry garcia and sing that i ain't gonna be treated this ol' way and there would be respect for all

i would do a mean gandhi and whisper whenever you are confronted with an opponent conquer him with love and love would rule

i would do a mean cs lewis and note that everything except god has a natural superior and we would all be humbled

i would do a mean da vinci and sneer that nothing strengthens authority as much as silence and there would be ruckus in the streets

i would do a mean jesus and feed the multitudes with but a few loaves and fish

i would do a mean gospel and go tell it on the mountain

would i be would i be would i be

i would provide you all with a perfect christmas solstice hannukah kwanza ramadan fesitval of lights holiday on ice rose bowl super bowl liberty bowl bowl of cherries ozfest live aid farm aid electric kool aide time of your lives

amen

 

Morning Confection

ah sugar

i pray

i pray every day that i'm able to drag my sorry ass out of bed i thank the goddess i thank jesus i thank the buddha i thank my dog the earth the sky the water as i stand before the ceramic porcelain altar giving up my offering

i stand in the garden naked lifting my arms lifting my cock lifting my soul and scream my gratitude scream my humble prayers scream my love

ah sugar

sugar ah
honey honey
you are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you

ah sugar sugar i pray every day for that sugar i pray every day for that sugar i love that morning sugar i dig that sugar in the morning i just love the feeling of morning sugar the goddess floats in through the window riding on the fading moonbeams looking for wanting stalks of cane looking to harvest the strong stiff stalks of cane looking to make the sugar love is sugar sugar is love

i pray for sugar i beg for sugar i say whisper slithering i say baby baby gotta give me the sugar i know it's early i know the day is young hell it's still a fucking infant but baby baby i dig your sugar so much i need it i thrive on it i just gotta gotta gotta

honey ah
sugar sugar
you are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you

stella stella stella she is love she is sugar i just want to be her dog i just want to lick her sugar i just want to nibble her sugar i just want to gnaw on her sugar i just want to breathe her sugar i just want to roll myself in her sugar and be her jelly roll i just want just want just want just want aaaahhhhhh

gimme gimme gimme in the morning the goddess declares the goddess proclaims the goddess has her own morning orgasm with her burst of dawn pushing forth that fiery ball from within her earthy cunt

i just can't believe the loveliness
of loving you
i just can't believe it's true

stella sweet stella sugar is the honey dragon in the morning she breathes the fire that caramelizes my sugar that melts my butter that whips my cream that creams my cheese she loves the slow sugar in the morning the sultry sugar in the morning the sticky sugar in the morning

baby i am your pastry chef in the morning i am your sweet confectioner i am your chocolatier i am your swirl i am your candy cane i am your lollipop i am  i am i am your candyman i am i am i am

love

when i kissed you girl
i knew how sweet a kiss could be
like the summer sunshine
pour your sweetness over me

i pray i worship at the bowl of your love i am your humble subject i am i am prone i am prostrate i am supine for your sugar baby i dig i dig i dig your sugar with a shovel i ladle your sugar with love i am i am your sugar slave

lawdy mercy i am fundamentalist i am congregationalist i am orthodox i am a fucking radical shiite jihadist for your sugar baby oh gimme gimme gimme ah lawdy sugar sugar

i breathe your sugar i inhale your sugar i am a hoover for your sugar let me just dip my finger into the bowl and swirl it around let me lick the beaters let me take the spatula to your love don't want to leave any leave any don't want to let any of that sugar spill on the floor oh baby i am your bounty quicker picker upper

yeah yeah yeah
pour your sugar on me oh yeah
pour your sugar on me honey
pour your sugar on me baby
i'm gonna make your life so sweet

ah sugar

prayer is good

morning prayer is so good

 

Take Me Home

sweet jesus take me home i have been away too long

i take you to jfk lot of traffic eighty dollars he says in a shrug in an accent i can't place from a look i can't place what the fuck and we're off i have a six o'clock we ok we going to make it he shrugs nods sure we make it we ok

four o'clock and we head down seventh avenue heading for the tunnel love on wheels baby i'm flying before i fly i'm the crow baby i'm high as a kite lit like a christmas tree toasted like a fucking poptart

it's just so easy to spin the yarn spin it's so easy i have yarns i have stories i have i mean shit we all all have new york taxi stories

i've been in an accident in a cab in new york one snow storm went right up on the sidewalk wiped out an entire village of newsracks and a card table of scarves and hats sliding to a rest on the corner no one got hurt i tossed the dude a tenspot and walked the final block to my meeting one time coming down from columbia when the cabbie decided to abandon his taxi in the middle of the street in spanish harlem which is scary cool if i ended it there but nothing happened the people there were very nice they helped me get my stuff out of the locked trunk since the fucker ran off with the keys i mean these people knew how to open a trunk without keys nice skill to have

the old man lay kicked back on his swedish modern version of the lazy boy and smiled at me and my aura all of my affairs are in order and i like to think that i've been fair about everything this apartment is worth a bit there's the stocks there's the bonds there's a few assorted items it's all in the will i've tried to be very fair i think i'm ready i've sort of come to terms

ah fiery moses set this bush on fire and speak guide this man on home he's afraid

i never fucked anybody in a taxi

i never had a blowjob in a taxi

i know i've bitten j's neck while ensconced in a backseat with her but it wasn't in new york she wants me to call her stella now

stella gave me a blowjob in a minivan ok it was our minivan it was hot it was in san francisco though

sweet david sweet david oh learned solomon he has a full time aide she's a big jamaican woman with a great big smile with a couple of gold teeth oh they are all jamaican women said my friend l actually stella's friend l but now she's my friend now too l said while at lunch today oh sweet david he talks to her in a patronizing kind of way but do i detect a little bit of respect a little bit of dare i say love in his voice

i have prayed in taxis i have picked my nose in taxis i have bitten my nails in taxis i've had many many erections in taxis i have slept in taxis and dreamt of getting a blowjob in a taxi i've been in a taxi while tripping i've been in a taxi while drunk i never wear a seatbelt in a taxi i've been in a taxi where i can't understand a single fucking word the driver is saying and i've been in been in a taxi where the driver can't understand a single fucking word i was saying i've eaten breakfast lunch dinner in a taxi i've smoked a joint in a taxi i don't remember getting the stinky finger in a taxi but it could have happened it could have i've never been in a taxi that killed anyone at least not while i was inside

my friend jc was in a taxi in new york last month and it went up on the sidewalk and killed a doorman jc was in town to run the new york marathon he was supposed to have run the next day which was going to be a sunday but jc didn't run he went to the hospital but the man who died didn't go to the hospital he died instantly they say the authorities say

i have had the same cabbie twice only once in new york

we were at a bar last night and tootie walked in and we chatted when i was in high school there was a television show called facts of life and tootie was one of the girls in the show she was the token black chick and i don't know her real name i think stella does

yo sid you're not dying today he said yeah i know don't know when but not too long from now i'm ok though i think i've been fair about things p the jamaican woman his aide she is crying

i didn't know that she was tootie i just thought geeze this short black woman with very nice breasts dressed all up like macy grey or doctor john i forget is pretty cute then some people at the bar started that oh look there's tootie and i think a few people said her real name but i forget and i didn't recognize her at all all i thought well wondered really was how nice those breasts would be as my pillow

i forgot to ask tootie for her autograph we had smoked a joint walking up through the park to the upper west side by the time we were passing tavern on the green we were pretty much feeling righteous and my man v wanted to have a drink at tavern on the green so we went in and had a drink i drank wine i stared at the exposed breasts of a gentlewoman in a cocktail dress at the bar and she became a little self conscious and put her hand over her cleavage in that modest feminine way and it was very sexy

i bet that she was wearing panty hose with a garter belt it was that kind of holiday night i believe i didn't ask her though i didn't think it polite

there were a lot of little white lights on the trees at tavern on the green so we me and my man v went on up to the shark bar it's cool as in kool they serve soul food i had collards i had gumbo i had cornbread i had some catfish i had some sweet potato pie oh my we walked back through the park we smoked another joint and stopped on the bridge that overlooked the ice skating rink but it was late no one was ice skating but it was very very white and very very brightly lit it was cold we smoked the joint wearing gloves i didn't ask my man v for his autograph either but i imagine he would have been more flattered than tootie

sweet jesus take me home he doesn't have a jesus he doesn't have a moses he used to have a moses but i don't think he really has a moses now the old dude needs a guide needs a guide

the dude drove a town car not really a taxi we drove through traffic lots of room in the car not in traffic last friday before christmas yeehah there are a million stories in the naked city this is one he drove he drove he honked his horn he cut people off in an offhanded way he cut people off and they'd flip us off i've never been flipped off so many times in such a short period of time he cut people off he'd roll his window down and wave afterward he was that way he'd say that guy is not a driver he can't drive some other car cut us off and he said that guy he's a driver

frogger came to mind i don't know i don't know this young dude he lives in queens with his brother been there ten years he wants to go to san diego thinks the weather will be just right he's from egypt hates the cold he drives like a driver the needle is threaded and it weaves a beautiful story through the magic carpet sliding left in front of the van and then back right in front of the taxi then left again two lanes over to find a slot in the left turn lane for three hundred yards and yank back hard right in front of the paratransit and back left into the open slot

god is great allah fucking akbar baby the old dude my father-in-law he's just old he's just old that's all it's catching up with him he's tired he's very tired he used to treat stella like shit now he says he's come to terms stella is coming to terms she's found a way to love him in spite of the past it's all about love it's all about family it's all we have in this short trip he's come to terms he said

sweet mother of earth the dude is a driver he hangs a left and the police have blocked off the entrance to the tunnel and he swears for the first time damn they should post a sign he whips a u in front of the police where we going now third ave don't worry we make it you have plenty of time whips a quick right into the next tunnel entrance down down down toll is four bucks both ways eight bucks i dig i dig no problem my friend we're through the ez pass and into traffic

the white lines in the road must have been real lines we shoot forward like a fucking snort of meth entering the bloodstream whoa baby whoosh down the chute onto the ramp screaming screaming dig dig pull up pull up pull up screeches to a halt then yanks hard right into the emergency lane sound wall two feet from the right side of the car sideview mirrors closer to the left sixty seventy eighty oh shit fifty forty thirty here we go forty sixty eighty

shit time for the short cut don't worry i live in queens i know queens

my dick is hard i feel that i shall never fuck again i feel that i shall never feel the sweet sweet envelope of pussy i'm going to die or at least be arrested as an accomplice for this maniac whoosh whoosh surface streets streetlights whip by buy whip baby red lights are fucking optional tonight i lean forward and say

hey dude

you like to smoke weed why don't i fire up a stick

because just fucking maybe you need to fucking calm down no thank you is it a religious thing or just a personal thing i ask and he says craning his neck to see around the car ahead he says i don't even smoke cigarettes yeah yeah i know all egyptians smoke cigarettes but i'm an athlete i am athletic i play football you know soccer 

fuck fuck fuck

the headlights bounce by the storefronts flash by the fucking world flashes by the old dude the old dude he came to san francisco for a while he came and checked it out i liked san francisco the blue skies the blue skies it was wonderful but it wasn't home it wasn't home for some reason this light isn't optional the young dude slams on his brakes

i notice that i've sucked the fine leather seat of the town car up my ass

i buckle my seat belt

the headlights bounce bounce bounce jesus jesus just don't let me bounce breathe breathe breathe lean back lean back lean back settle in settle down you gotta be a driver a driver doesn't use rear view mirrors i'm only worried about what is ahead not what is behind that's the secret my friend

the old dude the old dude he's going to die hell we're all going to die but there needs to be certain order there needs to be a certain process don't we need a guide don't we need a goddess to take us by the hand and show us the path lead us toward the light yada yada yada don't we don't we

you just gotta feel your way through my friend there is a pattern a driver sees the pattern no feels the pattern ah shit the dude has gone fucking luke skywalker on me breathe breathe a driver man a driver a driver just goes a driver gotta drive

breathe breathe

the old dude breathes he shakes my hand it's still a grip but soft the skin is discolored purplish around the wrists purplish just fifteen years ago this wrist kicked my ass in raquetball and told me trapped me in a hotel room and told me i was financially irresponsible do you have a plan you have to have a plan where will you be in five years do you have a plan said mean things to stella said mean things to stella who only wanted his love

the old dude breathes i breathe i settle back i breathe in lean into the turns i let the acceleration push me back into the soft leather i steady myself on the stops i grin and laugh when the other people out there they ain't driver when the other people out there flip us off and my young dude rolls down his window and waves happily

love is in the air and i look up and i see airplanes and signs and we're there and my watch doesn't even say five o'fucking-clock and i'm digging this e-ticket ride way too much and laugh and dare him to get head back to the city and still make it back for my flight and he laughs

the old dude shakes my hand and tells me to take care to take care of his daughter he's tried to be fair i tell him i will and p his wild jamaican angel gives me a hug and i say goodbye and he says goodbye

and i pay the young dude and slip him an extra twenty and say happy holidays

love is in the air

Morning Blues

there ain't no sugar when the alarm goes off at four fucking thirty in the morning there ain't no sugar she so pretty in her own little dreamscape the morning stars fading from the skylight she so pretty wild fucking hebrew hair sprawled across the pillow small little movement of the lips as the eye jiggles just a little beneath the lid dig

there ain't no sugar when the day begins before the day begins

i once had a little woman she was the best that i ever seen i knew a little girl she was the sweetest thing i ever seen you know she treated me like a king she was the doggone queen

little lights to guide me

packed the night before do it with my eyes closed the number of days minus the flight time divided by the sum of all fears times the probability of my actually getting a run in on this trip as a function of the of the square root of love equals the pairs of socks that i will be needing and everything else sort of falls into place unless i'm going to europe and then you need to fold in the factoral of the length of my two fingers inside of my sweet goddess

you know my momma left me reckless my daddy just drove me wild my momma let me run reckless and my daddy died and drove me wild i know i ain't good looking but i swear i'm some sweet woman's angel child

little lights to guide me

the street is so quiet at five o-fifteen at some point the paper was delivered by the ghost of news events past and i linger linger linger beneath the street light i want to go so fucking raymond chandler you can see the fog floating in the haze every twenty-five yards or so the spacing of the lights down the street and across the street where i know there is a park where i know there is a small redwood forest ok redwood grove i know it's there but at five o-thirty in mid-december darkness replaces the known world

i love i love i love and

sister tell your brother brother tell your auntie auntie tell your uncle tell your cousin tell your nephew i'm going to the country and momma don't you wanna go i might bring me a nice brunette i might bring along one or two more

little lights to guide me

sweetness drifts along my way and down the block at the bus stop a lone figure sends a soft note or two ah it's opera man you have to be up early to see opera man we don't the neighbors we don't really know where he lives from whence he hails we don't know but if you time it right if you just happen to be walking the dogs or just happen to have an early flight or meeting and just happen to be on the street sometimes if you're lucky you get opera man he sings the morning for you

don't know what the fuck he sings don't know what the fuck he sings but it's sweet and it's gentle and who knows maybe maybe maybe he doesn't exist at any time other than five o-thirty in the morning and the goddess has simply said you folk down on fulton street should have some morning love with your sugar let there be opera man and there he was and it was good

i done more for you woman away last winter i done scuffled through the summer and i scuffled through the fall i done more for you woman than the good lord have ever done hell i put hair up on your head and you know he ain't never give you none

leaning against the car the goddess lays some kind green bud into my bowl and the sweet sweet yogurt of morning smoke flows down my throat filling my lungs with morning buzz wake and bake perfect for trains and planes and the mornings thereof

sweet sticky sticky the bud so fresh so fresh so moist like sugar sparkling in the foggy fluorescence click click click goes the bic flame flashing crackling crackling sizzle sizzle sugar sugar

car door closes with a japanese ooomph thump efficiency and chuck d and public enemy eases me back into reality with a little late eighties fight the power and i hop the rhythm into drive and ride it on down the road turning onto park presidio and down into and through the park floating with wet headlights and tail lights and silhouettes staring ahead from within shiny little bubbles

little lights to guide me

the church bells ringing the secretary singing the preacher just a preaching can't you hear the sisters shouting the children in the pulpit momma trying to learn that song that no good dirty deacon done got my woman and gone

coming out of the park onto nineteenth avenue the world opens around me and chuck d takes me on down the corridor of row houses surrounded by three and four story office buildings and corner gas stations and restaurants and neon and bus stops and traffic lights and morning busy-ness hubbub has already permeated or maybe never left

bleeding onto two eighty down the beautiful highway through thick milky patches love the feel of the smooth ride accelerating to sixty seventy eighty floating floating through the traffic through the stream of reality the parking lot machine talks to me kindly sweetly reminding me that should my vehicle top off above six feet i might want to consider other places to park that would indeed be a less expensive alternative and i take my ticket and pull into a spot

you know i can't be no bank boss no superintendent hey boys i ain't giving up my temperament i promised the good lord never to give no call i think i hang around back and pick me up some jelly roll

out and locked and into the elevator down down down through a tunnel made up as someone's vision of an orwellian underground all very efficient from here on through ticket identification shoes off laptop out xray mild sweat slight twinge of stress about small amount of green kindness rolled up into a sock tucked away in the corner of my suitcase through through shoes back on laptop back into the bag emerging out of the anus of homeland security ah man i feel better just like the first shit of the morning pacific islanders and filipinos wearing crisp white shirts looking all serious at computer screens and waving anal probes that go beep beep around watches and belt buckles i just love it so when they ask me to lift my shirt and roll down my buckle so that they can make sure my cock is not loaded so that you and i will feel warm and snuggly in our airplane seats

i said big h left savannah lord she would not stop you oughta seen the color finally when she got the boiler hot come on reach over momma and hand me my traveling shoes i want you folks to know right now i got the statesboro blues

little lights to guide me

timing is everything and the coffee is strong peets is love in the morning phone calls with east coast while walking walking walking little ear bud attached talking to a little voice in my head all sorts of people talking to all sorts of little voices in their heads and we meander with purpose past newstands and seats and gates are you fucking kidding me ok ok ok if we split the platform position the platform with this spin we put up two more hurdles and the competition will need to do x and y now which will extend their time to market and we can fuck them up the ass with wild abandonment like we were ron fucking jeremy

my momma had 'em my sister had 'em my brother had 'em my daddy died with 'em when i got up this morning my family had them weary blues i poked my head down in the corner and grandma had 'em too

aw lawdy baby let the trip begin

Cold Water Dreamscape

on and on and on and on and on there is something about it there is something about it the ritual of love the ritual of the cold cunt of the goddess i know i return here over and over and over again but i can't get her out of my mind i can't remove these thoughts i can't avoid the collisions i bore everyone with my rantings with my preaching with my with my

the ice the foamy ice as i plunge deep within her on the first thrust from the beach wading in up to my waist until her frigid tongue laps at my cock and sends it inward like my fucking navel up to my waist and hands overhead like johnny fucking weissmuller up and over in a subtle arc hands hitting first followed by wrists followed by forearms by elbows and then my head throat shoulders torso swallowed by her sweet freezerbox crystals forming on my soul on my skin on my sphincter everything goes tight my fingers and toes become salty popsicles

dreaming about love

dreaming about such a mosaic walking down clement street a crepe with nutella in one hand a cup of genmai tea in the other the shop opened about a year ago vietnamese couple from paris all sorts of crepes made in the window and tapioca teas and green teas and genmai and oh my my my walking walking walking no responsibilities today

down the street is one fruit and vegetable stand and down the street is another fruit and vegetable stand and down the street is another and there's a truck with a guy pouring large fish into a plastic trash can and taking them inside to the fish market

you can't think when you are with her you can't think you can't process you can only feel you can only emote you can only flow where she allows you to go

dreaming about dying

not too worried about dying not really trying to book a time and date or anything not slipping the maitre d' a twenty or anything wanting to get a good table at my own wake not fucking crazy baby not too worried about dying

i have too many responsibilities i have too many things that i'm carrying around but let's just say let's just say let's just say that i had no responsibilities let's just pretend let's just close our eyes and click our heels together three times and repeat no weight on my shoulders three or four times

dreaming about dying

you have to always be cognizant about dying out here this ain't some sissy run through the park where you can stop to rest and sit on a rock or a fucking park bench you are out here baby over your head and when you stop to rest she decides how hard easy it will be she decides if your time is up she decides when and where when and where when and where like you have a fucking choice while you are in thirty feet of water with the shore a half mile away

and all around me are people speaking languages i don't know mostly asian mostly mandarin and cantonese but a sprinkling of other asian tongues and russian lots of russan and every now and then some french not much spanish in this neighborhood but some and even some english not the best english but some english and a number of irish accents lilting about

and indonesian food and thai food and italian food and ok it's a fucking pizza joint and russian food and turkish food and coffee here and coffee there and vietnamese food and japanese food ok it's a fucking chi chi sushi bar and dim sum and yeah yeah yeah your basic chinese restaurants and take out and and and

and people seem woven in their pasts and presents and presences and they dance in and among each other and their cultures and other cultures and they are all spending green money or begging green money and the aromas smells wafting

i mean these responsibilities these things that i must do these things that i just have to do i mean they are not bad actually i kind of like them kind of dig them they keep me interested they keep me going they keep the engine running but but

but

if i really had no responsibilities if i really had no one depending on me and if everything else was cool i mean i mean i mean and i was just swimming alone and swimming along and swimming alone and along and along and if i just happened to slowly slide deeper and deeper into her icy cunt and my stroke slowed and slowed and

of peking duck and coffee and donuts and bacon and cigarettes and and old books and ice cream and wet newspapers and fried rice and the occasional drift of teenagers and old hippies sneaking a toke on a hidden pipe or joint and last night's spilt beer wine whiskey on the sidewalk and exhaust from cars and trucks and vespas

who are honking for movement honking for parking spots honking for attention

slowed slowed slowed slowed

we walk so slowly down the street arm in arm and she scowls about something and i laugh at her scowl and she laughs at my laugh and i joke on her laugh on my laugh on her scowl and the dog eats the cat that ate the bird that ate the frog that ate the fly oh my

how could i not have something to keep me going

and my breathing and my breathing became faint and the water just folded around me if she just decided to wrap herself around me and take me inside and the water found its way into my stomach and found its way into my lungs and she just took me down took me down took me down i don't think rarely ever think it would

be so bad

if i were by myself if i were alone if i didn't have any responsibility

except i'd really kind of miss her

really

 

Hotel Madness

things i do in hotels that i never do at home 

leave the wet towel on the bed wear a bathrobe sit naked on the bed with my socks on watch pornography on pay per view watch cnn masturbate in front of picture windows especially in high rise hotels that face other high rise hotels watch the local news read usa today watch cnbc iron my shirts naked hell iron my shirts period eat dinner in bed smoke pot in bed masturbate while watching hbo's real sex eat toblerone steal soap, shampoo, conditioner, mouthwash and q-tips consider stealing the bathrobe but decide not to not because of the two hundred dollars that they will stick to my bill but just because it ain't the right thing to do where the line is between bathrobes and shampoo i don't know 

eat breakfast at a table eat breakfast period work out at a gym ok it's only the hotel gym but sometimes it's just too fucking cold to go for a run in the winter in new york and sometimes the hotel gym ain't so bad go sleepless because i don't change time zones well never have getting too old to change smoke pot in bed until i pass out because i can't sleep in different time zones in strange beds open up the yellow pages and write interesting comments in the escort section like oh man she was hot ask for belinda or ripoff with a big exclamation point and double underlines then turn down the page for easy location order turndown service for my bed make coffee with the free little packages that they provide and then don't drink it because it's shit coffee

go without cookies after i've smoke pot in bed because there are no cookies in the cupboard there ain't even a fucking cupboard and i'm too stoned to get dressed since i'm lying naked on the bed with nothing but my socks on and the really good blowjob scene is about to come up on teen angles three too stoned to get dressed and walk out my room down the hallway down the elevator past the snack shop gift shop that is closed out the door and around the corner to the all night store and too stoned to call up room service for a piece of pie cake because there is the same issue of getting dressed i could just put on the bath robe but that is a little too fucking bizarre even for me to open my hotel room door wearing nothing but a bathrobe and invite in the waiter or the waitress it's just too fucking hugh hefner

 

Commodores Part IV

jim morrison said this is the end

we walked we walked we walked across that bridge it is a long bridge it was a long bridge it must have been a couple of miles long you could see and see and see and see and you could see your breath it was cold and the wind just whipped up and over and through us and we stopped midspan to unwrap one of those little foils of hashish neat little one gram packets packaged for quick and easy sale quick and easy sail pretty easy business hundred dollars an ounce gives me twenty-eight point two grams at seven dollars per so that gave me enough to eat on i was an early entrepreneur although i tended to smoke my profits what the fuck

we walked and we walked and we walked with our thumbs held out we split up into two groups of three i don't remember exactly who the third member of our group was but kevin came with me the third guy may have been the schmuck i couldn't remember i'm pretty sure it wasn't evan or rich it could have been chrono but i don't think so

we went up ahead it was sunday and it was the afternoon and we needed to get back and the sun was out which was cool but it was cold and our thumbs turned red we didn't have gloves i mean come on it was a spur of the moment thing we were stoned and we were standing on the bridge less than twenty-four hours after we had departed emory university that fine institution of higher learning

from whom my parents later that summer would receive a letter indicating that their son had been discovered with a bong outside of dobbs hall underneath the aforementioned oak tree with the aforementioned people and because of whom i had to explain to my dearly departed mother what a fucking bong was well geeze mom you see it's this plastic tube kind of thing and it's got this bowl and this hole yeah we call it a shotgun no i don't know why maybe it's because when you get a hit what's a hit well it's a toke what's a toke well it's it's it's shit mom i just use it to smoke a little weed sometimes you know how the pressure is at these higher institutions of learning don't worry it's not like i'm doing

heroin

and it's not like the letter is from fucking

joe friday

and the water looked on the lake just like the water looked in the bay this morning the wind was whipping it up and i'm sure it was a cold fucking swim in that lake just like it was a cold fucking swim in the bay this morning whip whip whip whip them waves baby that first dip takes your breath away just like you take my breath away the first dip takes my breath away as i dive into the breaking foam as i dive into your open foam the fingers tingle first the toes tingle second the nose the nose the nose goes numb and then it creeps down my arms and up my legs your legs and i can see the crystals forming as i turn my head to breathe baby just open your legs a little more so i can breathe a little more a little more yes yes yes

and we loaded a pipe and we huddled around to protect the bic lighter from the wind and we must have looked like quite the progressive little group three guys on a bridge huddled together with puffs of smoke arising up from our natural chimney we must have been quite the attraction because they pulled over on the middle of the bridge this was an interstate highway mind you this was interstate eighty-five coming down from greenville south carolina heading down to atlanta and then on to birmingham or is it montgomery hell i don't care it's fucking alabama fucking alabama is one fucked up little state let me tell you and if you happen to live there i'm sorry but it is one fucked up state probably only topped by or in a dead heat for most fucked up state with texas mississippi and arkansas ah hell i guess texas wins

they pulled over

a baby shit green nineteen sixty-five four door impala with a white vinyl top and white wall tires and spoked chrome reversals and they stopped up ahead of us and then they backed up down the fucking interstate on a fucking bridge and we ran up ahead to hook up with them and we got up to the car and this window rolled down this brother was sitting in the front seat and you could see him doing the manual roll down we all used to do the manual roll down every one is so fucking spoiled now kids these days don't even know how to roll down a fucking car window and he said

need a ride my friend

and we all hopped into the back seat all three of us into this huge backseat where this other fat albert looking guy was already sitting and so it was just a little bit crowded then we figured out that we needed to put our packs into the trunk and so we hopped back out of the car and and the driver hopped out of the car and opened the trunk and cars were blowing past us on the bridge honking their horns and the driver this tall skinny black dude with a seventies carolina fro right out of superfly with the fake silk polyester printed saturday night fever shirt and the purple bell bottoms and the platform stacks skinny mother fucker raised his hand high and flipped them off with the longest middle finger this side of wilt chamberlain and then we all hopped back into the car and the driver said

where you boys headed

and we told him we were going to atlanta and they said they were going to atlanta and that was cool we had us a ride all the way there that was cool and they said that they were from greenville and were heading down to atlanta to hook up with some friends did we know them and they said a name and we said no man we don't know the dudes but we're sure they are ok by us and they said cool

and they had an eight track tape player and in this eight track tape player they had a a bootleg tape of the commodores playing and they asked us if we liked the commodores and we were just glad to be out of the cold and we said yeah man we dig the commodores although i don't ever remember listening to the commodores except maybe at a high school dance and maybe i had copped a feel from this girl jill when i was dancing with her to some commodores tune she had lovely breasts and she let me feel them up

and we smoked cigarettes and we told jokes and we told stories and we tried to make our stories sound totally street and they would roll their eyes and laugh anyway they were pretty fucked up you could tell and i think having us in the car kind of weighed it down and made them go slower which was probably a good thing

and they passed us a bottle of brandy and we drank with them and then they asked the magic question

you boys cool

and we said oh yeah we're cool and they said well we all got some killer weed and they rolled a little pin joint and passed it back to us and we smoked it and ok we were upper middle class white boy dope heads who were just a little bit spoiled by the kind green bud and we rolled our eyes this was just fucking mexican shake killer weed our ass but we said hey this is tasty bro and they smiled and we said

want to try a little of our stash

and they said sure and we rolled a nice phattie none of this chintzy pin joint shit i'm talking phat and round and long and we creamed a healthy amount of hashish into this phatbone and lit it up and passed it around and the brothers went into a grin spin that slowed the car down to around thirty-five miles per hours and they got really quiet like we thought maybe we had overdone it just a little maybe we had just totally fucked them up when the tall skinny dude the driver turned full around in his seat with a grin that went from just beneath one side of his fro to the other side and said little dudes that was just about the smoothest weed that i've ever

smoked

and we all laughed because his buddy in the passenger seat had to grab the wheel because skinny wasn't looking where he was going and the car even though we were going mighty slow did the big car swerve or what

and then he settled back down and went totally quiet again and that's when we noticed the music that's when we noticed that the same tape had been in the entire time that's when we noticed that not only had that tape been in the player the entire time but that tape had been stuck on the same track the entire time that track had only one song on it and that song was

once twice three times a lady

it played once twice three times and then it played again and again

and then we had to piss really really really badly and these guys were just settling back and they didn't even notice that the song was playing over and over and over again they just sang along some in kind of mumbled hushed tones and we tried to sing along in mumbled tones as well

once twice three times a lady

over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again until we were about to scream and we were about to piss our pants

once twice three times a lady

and kevin nudged me and whispered for me to suggest that they change tapes or at least change tracks and i shook my head because i didn't want to upset my ride here i told kevin he should ask if it was bothering him so badly hoping that it was bothering him worse than it was bothering me and we went on and on and on and on

once twice three times a lady

arrrrggggghhhhhhh

so we rolled another joint and lit it up in the off chance that perhaps we would just fucking pass out and go to sleep and wouldn't have to listen to it when it went click click click and we knew that once again it had failed to change tracks and this went on for two hours or more and it nearly fucking drove us out of our minds it could very well have been a nancy reagan plot to get us off drugs except that jimmy carter was president that reagan was sneaky doing that kind of shit before he even became president

we all know he fucked carter with the hostage negotiations before he became president he just might have fucked us white boy college students in the same way

once twice three times a lady

oh god just wreck the fucking car oh jesus i promise that i will listen to gospel i will listen to fucking choir music every sunday morning i will give up all my earthly possessions and walk this earth forever preaching the word just let this fucking song end sweet mother of jesus mary joseph and the fucking goat he road in on just get this song out of my existence be gone devil be gone

and then they pulled off at the north druid hills exit and we got out of the car and we got our packs out of the trunk and we all gave each other hugs and i threw them a couple of nice foil packages of hashish and they hugged us again and we ran into the bushes and pissed for a good thirty minutes or least it seemed and then we caught the

bus

back to school back to emory back to the dorm back to dobbs hall we had meal tickets we had a warm shower we had we had we had we had

each other

and we had each other for a couple more years and we had each other for eternity but somehow

we blew it

and now we have we have we have we have

something else

Commodores Part III

this is kind of the middle this is kind of the sweet spot this is the fucking navel of my tale

this is where i pontificate on where the fuck all my friends went this is where i wonder wonder wonder where they may have gone this is where i play the what if game this is where the world ends and the world begins

not a cloud in the sky always wanted to begin a story with a line about clouds and skies always thought it would be one of those snoopy moments where it begins with a dark and stormy night and somewhere in there the clouds would come up in the discussion but this is a much better approach i wish my life were on the same parallel with not a cloud in the sky

kevin was the man he was my man he lived across the hall from me freshman year we both could not stand our assigned roomies i probably could not stand my roomie more than he could not stand his roomie my roomie my roomie my roomie loved jesus yes he did does and jesus loved him or at least that's the way the song goes hell the song says he loves me too but my roomie said i was going to hell ah what the fuck

we were in heaven by the lake we were nowhere near hell we sat in our pews and kneeled in front of the goddess and took our communion from her gentle hands and prayed that she would satisfy our hardons when we returned to civilization and that maybe she might even help us get back safely to said civilization

kevin was my main he was my dude he was my brother we hung out he taught me about writing he taught me about love he was all about love he had a heart as big as the old oak tree where we'd sit beneath in the evenings and pass jays back and forth he was from western pennsylvania he was really a bit of a fuck off he ended up dropping out of school and taking a job in the restaurant industry and he moved to new orleans eventually and then he moved away away away and i never saw him again i googled him once but his name is quite common and i didn't have time to search through all four hundred and seventy-five thousand three hundred and fifty-three hits that came up so

kevin and i once spent three hours in tallulah gorge talking bert down off of a boulder when he was tripping the boulder was only five feet high but bert had bigger worries and the mushrooms didn't help and now bert is dead no he didn't fall off the boulder he died of aids in the eighties

kevin and i had a house on ponce de leon with chrono and three other schmucks and we had a cat a kitten really and kevin loved that cat although it used to come upstairs and shit in chrono's clothes pile

kevin and i used to take my car to evan's fine foods no it didn't belong to evan our friend it was just the name of the place meat and two vegetable kind of place we always got smothered chicken and mashed potatoes and banana cream pie and coffee and we were happy it was an e-f-f experience

kevin and i used to listen to music together he had this infatuation with linda rondstat and jackson brown and i didn't but i stayed up all night with him in line waiting to buy tickets to jackson brown and helped him get tickets to linda rondstat and we saw dave bromberg together and we saw iggy pop together and we saw the sex pistols together and we saw jerry garcia together and we saw the new riders together and we saw willie nelson together and we saw the new barbarians together and we saw jerry jeff walker together and we saw the dixie dregs together and

he gave me my first book to write in and i still have it

kevin and i sat around the fire on lake hartwell and watched the others sleep and we smoked a joint we shared a joint we talked whispered really it was so nice out bright blue skies and pine trees and wind bouncing across the lake it was nice we didn't want to spoil it with our voices we were hungry we didn't even bring toilet paper then we shared a cigarette

kevin met a woman later the next year then that woman broke his heart and he moved to new orleans and then i started hanging out with the woman that broke his heart and i discovered why he loved her and i fell in love and she tried to break my heart but i wouldn't let her i was stubborn that way i wonder how life would have worked out if kevin had been stubborn that way if he had said no baby you are not going to break my heart then where would i be i wouldn't have her now

before i got stubborn with her though i had another woman and we broke each other's hearts and evan started hanging with this woman and i should have just said yo brother be happy yo sister be happy but i was a jerk and then we were all jerks and then evan and i had a falling out and then we i guess we just said hey dude she is out of the picture you are my buddy you are my pal i dig where you are you dig where i am let's just forget about it and that was that

i'm glad that kevin never got stubborn but i wish that he still loved me

because i'm always on that lake sharing a cigarette with him sharing a joint with him sharing the quiet with him sharing myself with him i just wish that he'd drop by the lake sometime and hang with me but it ain't never going to happen i heard a rumor that he lives in los angeles now wouldn't that be a trip

and the others got up and they got up one by one and they wandered off to pee and curse the fact that we had no toilet paper and they wandered back to smoke a little breakfast with us and it turns out that one or two of us had actually bought something besides beer at the store and a couple of candy bars were passed around and a couple of bags of potato chips were passed around and we enjoyed the breakfast of champions

and we threw rocks into the water and had contests to see who could skip the rock the furthest who could skip the rock the most times who could walk on water or come close to it who could pee the furthest while running backwards who could inhale the most part of a joint who could who could who could

love

and i was in awe when i went to college i was just a cracker from south georgia i was such a redneck hippie pseudointellectual asshole and these guys i mean these guys were something i mean evan was a fucking artist that could take junk from the trashcan and make it sing and rich was this musician who had spent a good part of his life in india his parents were missionaries go fucking figure he was the classic preacher's kid and he had wild tales upon tales upon tales and kevin was a writer and chrono was just fucking sharp as a fucking tack i mean he fucking was the sharpest tack in the box too bad he grew to like heroin

and i was in awe just trying to keep up with these guys i thought i had died and gone to heaven with these guys they were my pals they were my brothers they were my cousins they were they were they were

and now they are not

how the fuck does that happen how the fuck does that happen i mean there are fucked up things in life shit happens and all that but what the fuck how the fuck where did they go

chrono disappeared this past summer just up and fucking vanished it was probably advisable since the law was after him since he owed everyone money since he kind of lost it i mean he really lost it he had everything could have had everything he was the son with the talents in the bible that just blew them well except in chrono's case he snorted them it makes me so fucking mad i am so angry that he just up and vanished i helped him until the end and he lied to me up until the end and what the fuck

he knew how to wrangle some food from some people that had stopped at the roadside picnic area

and rich man he just sort of faded away i mean he was swept off his feet by a woman who would fuck him every which way but sunday and i bet that she did that too she was spooky beautiful and he simply fell pussy has that effect on us men i know

evan says that he saw him the other month he is still in atlanta

and evan is still an artist and he's now having a baby and he's scared to death because he doesn't know that it's the coolest thing in the world he'll learn and then he won't be so scared oh he'll be scared all right but he'll be scared in other ways he'll be scared in that protective daddy way and that's cool and he'll be cool he'll be a good dad

and we eventually decided that we needed to move from one spot to another and we eventually decided that perhaps we should hitch hike back on down to atlanta because it was just too fucking cold to spend another night and so we started back down the road across the bridge

 

Commodores Part II

this is kind of the beginning of the middle

oh lawdy oh lawdy the fire died down the clouds came up the moon disappeared the wind picked up the only visible images emanating from the black being the occasional red bud of a cigarette from one or the other of us deep from beneath our sleeping bags the cold crept in

these boys were we men these boys were my best friends i was in constant awe that i could have friends like this that i had buds that would simply hop on pop at the odd chance that we could have a little fun with a simple choice of what was behind door number two as opposed to door number one there is really only one that i can pick up the phone and call there is only one who picks up the phone and says yo t what's up when i call there is really only one

there is really only one

there were two there really did used to be two there were two but i lost track of chrono this summer only this past summer he has been heading elsewheres for a couple of years now hell for more than a couple of years he's been heading elsewheres for at least the last four years i think it began around the time of the clinton impeachment hearings maybe there's a connection and then george w must've just sent him over the edge not that he ever voted i don't think that chrono ever voted

turns out that he had a bit of a fucking problem

a little problem with that white stuff man the shit just took control over him go fucking figure it's one of those things where you can look back through that wiggly little path dark tunnel of our past that burps us out every fucking day that we manage to pull our sorry asses out of bed if we look back through that tunnel we can say yeah we should have know but hey but hey but hey you never know you never know you never could have known i mean what if that one time that one time that you yourself were supposed to meet up with him way back way back way back when and lend him some money and what if you had put the wrong address on the envelope and someone else had ended up with the dough and chrono would have ended up with nothing at least that day and instead of option number twenty-two-fifty that day he might have selected option number seventeen-eleven and ended up meeting some beautiful

blonde dominatrix nymphomaniac that had a thing for greek men

and the whole world might have been different

the cold crept in and tried to claw its way into our sleeping bags no tent hard clay dirt fucking floor could be a fucking asphalt parking lot for all we could see right now little bitty pebbles poking into my back shit shit shit i hate it when it's so fucking cold and i have to get up and take a piss it's just too fucking cold and i have to piss like a fucking race horse like a fucking russian race horse ah shit i can't feel the tip of my nose it's so fucking cold i jump out of my sleeping bag and run over to the edge the edge of what i couldn't fucking tell you i run over to the edge of the clearing i guess and let it all hang out and the vigor of my stream sends an arc over the fucking moon and down in a spray of falling stars into the dry frozen weeds

urinal steam

drifting up like the fog machine at a pink floyd concert and midstream the cold starts to rise from the bare feet up through the heels through the ankles through my calves like i'm a tree stuck in the clay and the ice flows through my fucking xylem and phloem up through my knees until i'm shivering just enough to shake my frozen limp penis around like a garden hose on a hot august afternoon and piss sprays everywhere including my leg and i finally finish and

stuff my cock

back down into my pants who the fuck you calling a boy and slip back into my sleeping bag it's like sliding back into the plastic cover of a kool-aide ice pop and so instead of standing up shivering now i'm lying down shivering

and i dream about florida

and when i wake up i am the first to wake up i'm always the first to wake up i like to be the first one to wake up i like to get up and make out with the morning she's so shy when others are around she won't french kiss me unless we're alone

and when i wake up it's no dreamy arousal from a deep sleep it's a spring to baby the sun is shining and the lake is like fucking right here in front of us if i had taken a left instead of right in the middle of the night i would have been standing in water up to my knees when i peed

and this morning i woke up when it was dark my alarm goes off when it is dark when it is still early thirty i still like to wake up and make a move on the goddess only now she sometimes sleeps with me all night long and this morning the alarm went off it's not the alarm really it's the radio and it's just boring npr in the morning and it's not like it's really good radio bob edwards is getting old it's like radio meatloaf it ain't great but i've had it every morning for twenty years i guess meatloaf ain't so bad

pussy ain't never been meatloaf

and the lake is huge and goes forever and i wander over and there's ice at the edge thin ice most translucent ice master i reach out with my boot and tap it with my toe and it cracks and breaks into water

and i lean over and throw a handful of water on my face when the shock is over i shake my head and throw another handful when that shock is over i shake my head like a wet dog and throw another handful until my dick is no longer hard

i married kevin's girl only at this time he hadn't even met her yet and evan slept with my girl we had both met her by then but she was going out with someone else but evan didn't really sleep with her until i had gone and split up with her but that didn't matter because i was still pissed and i thought i could kick his ass but i never did try it's a good thing because evan's bigger than me and probably would have kicked my ass

i never slept with chrono's girl or slept with rich's girl or slept the other schmuck's girl i don't think and i don't think that they ever slept with any of the girls i was sleeping with either but that doesn't mean we weren't close i mean i still loved them anyway

and then they began to wake up one by one and kevin built a fire he was that way